LOL.

Laugh Out Loud; better known as L.O.L

A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie.He decides to test it at dinner.
DAD: Son, Where were you today during school hours?
SON: At school *Robot slaps Son* SON: OK,I went to the movies
DAD: Which one?
SON: ToyStory *he slaps son again* SON: OK, it was day with a pornstar
DAD: WHAT? When I was ur age I didn't even know what porn was! *he slaps dad*
MOM: HAHA!After all he's ur son *he slaps mom*

_____________

My teacher pointed at me with his ruler and said: "At the end of this ruler is an idiot!!" I got detention after I asked him which end he was referring to.
____________

How come when your wifes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy & say "congratulations!" But nobody rubs your balls and says "good job".
__________

If I sleep to much, my parents complain. If I don’t get enough sleep, my parents complain. If I eat too much, my parents complain. If I don’t eat enough, my parents complain. If I’m always in my room, my parents complain. If I go out too much, my parents complain. I CAN’T WIN
_____

Someone Hacked into a Blondes computer account. The password was: MickeyGoofyPlutoDaisyCinderellaShrekDonkeyFionaWashingtonD.C. When asked why she had such a long password she replied that she was told it had to have at least eight characters and one capital.